What I’m Hoping My Obituary Says
With a reputation for being dangerously spontaneous, Sean Milnamow, 94, died Tuesday after getting into a knife fight at the Jersey Shore.
Known best for his numerous ear enhancement surgeries and collection of giant hats, Sean leaves behind a legacy of taking unfunny and confusing jokes way too far.
While he was never an aggressive human being, he always bragged that he wanted to die at the hand of someone else’s blade while visiting the Jersey Shore. This wish was to be his final unfunny and confusing joke. And like all the others, it went too far.
He is survived by his embarrassed wife, embarrassed kids, and embarrassed grandkids. His great-grandkids are more baffled than embarrassed.